Difficult Times
Difficult Times - WWII and the Corona Virus
While the German Army was losing the war and withdrawing from its wide sweep into Europe and Russia, the “home front” suffered under unending air raids. Saturation bombings caused the death of hundreds of thousands of German civilians. We spent nights in the cellar, warning sirens blaring day and night. My father had outfitted our cellar with steel doors and sandbags around window openings and also some bunk beds so that we children could sleep there. At 7 pm my mother handed out bowls with some cabbage and a slice of bread with pig lard for dinner. Then we went to sleep on the straw-filled mattresses.
But one night there was a major raid on our town. The preliminary and acute alarms sounded one after the other, so loud it almost caused the heart to stop. Bombs exploded in the neighborhood with crashes that deafened the ears. The factories near the railroad station and the surrounding neighborhoods were targeted. Then came the high-pitched whine of an air mine coming closer and getting louder, increasing in intensity, and then the deafening sound of it slamming into a house close to us. I remember the floor of the cellar rising like a wave, pushing my knees into my chin. The air was filled with choking clouds of dust flaking from the shaking walls. Fear was so thick that I could taste it. And then the next high-pitched whine came closer, louder and louder, and I, a child of 11, KNEW that it would hit us and our lives would end in the next second, crushed under rubble. I waited like a mute, resigned animal for death. The next air mine kept whistling and coming closer, but it passed over us and slammed into a house on the other side, killing all its inhabitants. Amidst choking clouds of dust I realized that I was still alive and that death had passed us by.
I came out of that cellar a changed person. I had lost my faith in God. I had tasted death, and life would never look the same. My family survived, but the people in the houses hit by the two bombs had been killed. My girlfriend was one of them. Why? Why her and not me? Where was the reason in this? Where was God? How can you ever believe that your actions count, that there is meaning to life if this vast, impersonal power may come out of nowhere and wipe you out, regardless of your merit, regardless of the goodness of your soul, regardless of anything you want to do or aspire to? From then on I have lived with the possibility of death every day.
The war, the bombing nights, the constant threat of death and the incidences of destruction and fear every day took joyfulness and easiness away from us children. I just remember that life was so hard and it was necessary to expect nothing, to be grateful for every crumb, and to stay small and quiet in a corner. When the war finally ended with the complete destruction of Germany, there was no government, no railroad, no mail deliveries, very little food, no clothing, no health care, there were only ruins and hopelessness, but there was the knowledge of the crimes that had been committed by Germany, and perhaps this vast emptiness was a punishment for that. Nobody spoke to us children and gave hope or comfort or even explanations. I remember that I, as a child, withdrew into myself and cut any expectations down to a bare minimum.
I was asked what I learned from that time which could be applied now at the time of the corona virus. There is really no comparison, but I can write down some of the emotional rules which helped me deal with these difficult times.
Here they are:
Be quiet, be undemanding, follow orders
Don’t have expectations
Be grateful, be kind, be helpful
Don’t take up space
Make no noise, stay in a corner, play quietly
Don’t make it hard on parents
Do as much for yourself as possible
Don’t start fights
Occupy yourself, think about your life
Don’t dwell on wishes, don’t complain
Deal with the unexpected, don’t blame anyone
Finish your plate, eat everything
Wear everything that is given to you
Do something creative
Read and learn, be patient
Don’t hurt anybody
Do as much for yourself as possible
Recognize the difficulty of life for grownups
Be content with little
Make friends with death
While every situation and person is different, trauma (if survived) does have long-lasting impact.
There are at least two important lessons to take from this personal story:
1. Human beings are resilient and can adapt to all kinds of otherwise unimaginable situations,
2. Human beings need and deserve not only physical survival, but also support for healthy psychological development during trying times. That is especially true for children.
Inge Etzbach
Inge32@outlook.com
While the German Army was losing the war and withdrawing from its wide sweep into Europe and Russia, the “home front” suffered under unending air raids. Saturation bombings caused the death of hundreds of thousands of German civilians. We spent nights in the cellar, warning sirens blaring day and night. My father had outfitted our cellar with steel doors and sandbags around window openings and also some bunk beds so that we children could sleep there. At 7 pm my mother handed out bowls with some cabbage and a slice of bread with pig lard for dinner. Then we went to sleep on the straw-filled mattresses.
But one night there was a major raid on our town. The preliminary and acute alarms sounded one after the other, so loud it almost caused the heart to stop. Bombs exploded in the neighborhood with crashes that deafened the ears. The factories near the railroad station and the surrounding neighborhoods were targeted. Then came the high-pitched whine of an air mine coming closer and getting louder, increasing in intensity, and then the deafening sound of it slamming into a house close to us. I remember the floor of the cellar rising like a wave, pushing my knees into my chin. The air was filled with choking clouds of dust flaking from the shaking walls. Fear was so thick that I could taste it. And then the next high-pitched whine came closer, louder and louder, and I, a child of 11, KNEW that it would hit us and our lives would end in the next second, crushed under rubble. I waited like a mute, resigned animal for death. The next air mine kept whistling and coming closer, but it passed over us and slammed into a house on the other side, killing all its inhabitants. Amidst choking clouds of dust I realized that I was still alive and that death had passed us by.
I came out of that cellar a changed person. I had lost my faith in God. I had tasted death, and life would never look the same. My family survived, but the people in the houses hit by the two bombs had been killed. My girlfriend was one of them. Why? Why her and not me? Where was the reason in this? Where was God? How can you ever believe that your actions count, that there is meaning to life if this vast, impersonal power may come out of nowhere and wipe you out, regardless of your merit, regardless of the goodness of your soul, regardless of anything you want to do or aspire to? From then on I have lived with the possibility of death every day.
The war, the bombing nights, the constant threat of death and the incidences of destruction and fear every day took joyfulness and easiness away from us children. I just remember that life was so hard and it was necessary to expect nothing, to be grateful for every crumb, and to stay small and quiet in a corner. When the war finally ended with the complete destruction of Germany, there was no government, no railroad, no mail deliveries, very little food, no clothing, no health care, there were only ruins and hopelessness, but there was the knowledge of the crimes that had been committed by Germany, and perhaps this vast emptiness was a punishment for that. Nobody spoke to us children and gave hope or comfort or even explanations. I remember that I, as a child, withdrew into myself and cut any expectations down to a bare minimum.
I was asked what I learned from that time which could be applied now at the time of the corona virus. There is really no comparison, but I can write down some of the emotional rules which helped me deal with these difficult times.
Here they are:
Be quiet, be undemanding, follow orders
Don’t have expectations
Be grateful, be kind, be helpful
Don’t take up space
Make no noise, stay in a corner, play quietly
Don’t make it hard on parents
Do as much for yourself as possible
Don’t start fights
Occupy yourself, think about your life
Don’t dwell on wishes, don’t complain
Deal with the unexpected, don’t blame anyone
Finish your plate, eat everything
Wear everything that is given to you
Do something creative
Read and learn, be patient
Don’t hurt anybody
Do as much for yourself as possible
Recognize the difficulty of life for grownups
Be content with little
Make friends with death
While every situation and person is different, trauma (if survived) does have long-lasting impact.
There are at least two important lessons to take from this personal story:
1. Human beings are resilient and can adapt to all kinds of otherwise unimaginable situations,
2. Human beings need and deserve not only physical survival, but also support for healthy psychological development during trying times. That is especially true for children.
Inge Etzbach
Inge32@outlook.com